WONDERLAND: MEMOIR OF A BLACK MARKET ADOPTION

$24.95

IndieReader Award Winner, True Crime

Recited to her like a fairy tale, Patricia’s “adoptive” mother loved to tell the story about the snowy January day in 1970 that she and her husband pulled up along a Houston, Texas hospital curb and drove away with their brand new baby. Yet Patricia would grow up celebrating a made-up birthday, haunted by nightmares of "The Dark Man."  At 12, when her parents confess they never received her birth certificate, questions mount about alleged extortion and the impossible choice they say they faced: go to the police and report the shady attorney that acquired the infant or stay silent and meet his demands. Did they really dole out $30K to keep their paperless child? Such revelations compel young Patricia to wonder how she came into this family—no judge, no paperwork, no questions asked—and lead her on a quest to discover "Who In the World Am I?" 

Navigating her bipolar mother's alcoholism and caring for her disabled 600-pound father, Patricia spends her teen years trying to save her saviors—unaware of the lifelong threat haunting them: at any moment, someone could come back for their child.

At eighteen, pregnant and standing in her birth mother's shoes, Patricia discovers a shattering secret that launches a lifetime search for answers. But it takes decades—and her adoptive mother's death—before Patricia realizes those holding the truth won't live forever. Guided by her mother's ghost, she races to unlock a labyrinth of lies designed to erase her true identity.

A tumble down the rabbit hole of America's baby trade, part detective story, part searing family portrait, Wonderland exposes what happens when adoption's house of cards finally falls—when missing documents and dark family secrets can no longer withstand the weight of one woman's relentless search for truth. A haunting reckoning with Baby Scoop Era exploitation that asks: are we ready for Baby Scoop 2.0?


Also a finalist for the 2026 Eric Hoffer Award, the 2026 Indies Today Award and the 2026 Next Generation Indie Book Award.

IndieReader Award Winner, True Crime

Recited to her like a fairy tale, Patricia’s “adoptive” mother loved to tell the story about the snowy January day in 1970 that she and her husband pulled up along a Houston, Texas hospital curb and drove away with their brand new baby. Yet Patricia would grow up celebrating a made-up birthday, haunted by nightmares of "The Dark Man."  At 12, when her parents confess they never received her birth certificate, questions mount about alleged extortion and the impossible choice they say they faced: go to the police and report the shady attorney that acquired the infant or stay silent and meet his demands. Did they really dole out $30K to keep their paperless child? Such revelations compel young Patricia to wonder how she came into this family—no judge, no paperwork, no questions asked—and lead her on a quest to discover "Who In the World Am I?" 

Navigating her bipolar mother's alcoholism and caring for her disabled 600-pound father, Patricia spends her teen years trying to save her saviors—unaware of the lifelong threat haunting them: at any moment, someone could come back for their child.

At eighteen, pregnant and standing in her birth mother's shoes, Patricia discovers a shattering secret that launches a lifetime search for answers. But it takes decades—and her adoptive mother's death—before Patricia realizes those holding the truth won't live forever. Guided by her mother's ghost, she races to unlock a labyrinth of lies designed to erase her true identity.

A tumble down the rabbit hole of America's baby trade, part detective story, part searing family portrait, Wonderland exposes what happens when adoption's house of cards finally falls—when missing documents and dark family secrets can no longer withstand the weight of one woman's relentless search for truth. A haunting reckoning with Baby Scoop Era exploitation that asks: are we ready for Baby Scoop 2.0?


Also a finalist for the 2026 Eric Hoffer Award, the 2026 Indies Today Award and the 2026 Next Generation Indie Book Award.

Praise for WONDERLAND

“As Meyer chronicles her sleuthing, she zooms out to examine the social and emotional forces that drove families to seek under the table adoptions in the so-called “Baby Scoop Era,” from 1945 to 1973, and predicts that the end of Roe v. Wade could lead to another surge. The result is both a poignant personal narrative and a work of impressive reporting.”

PUBLISHERS WEEKLY

"More than a personal memoir... a close examination of flawed systems, their lasting impacts, and how trauma, memory, and experience create layers of complexity... Librarians will want to highly recommend it for an exceptionally wide circle of readers."

—MIDWEST BOOK REVIEW


"Wonderland is an important contribution to everyone in the adoption world, from policy-makers to professionals to the millions of people for whom this intricate institution is part of daily life. It vividly shows the very real consequences when bad actors exploit systemic vulnerabilities in the adoption system and – most pointedly – it provides a much-needed reminder of why transparency, equity, honesty, and adoptee-centered practices are vital. Oh, did I mention that it’s a compelling read for almost anyone?"  

—Adam Pertman, Pulitzer Prize-nominated veteran of the Boston Globe, President of the National Center on Adoption and Permanency | Author of Adoption Nation

"In Wonderland Patricia Knight Meyer excavates her own identity through deep layers of trauma and trafficking, loss and longing. It is a brutal story—abuse, addiction, assault—told by an unflinching narrator, determined to document the divergence between adoption's beautiful promises and what can happen when maternal desperation meets back alley need and greed. It is a coming-of-age story, a personal mystery, and a heartfelt reckoning all in one."

— Gretchen Sisson, Sociologist and author of Relinquished: The Politics of Adoption and the Privilege of American Motherhood. 

“This memoir unfolds with the momentum of a television series—propulsive and immersive—yet grounded in precise dialogue and careful attention to scene and setting. The writing creates a visceral sense of presence, placing the reader inside each moment as it unfolds. Balancing narrative drive with clear psychological insight, the book illuminates the complex realities of adoption, including the lasting impact of falsified records, illegal practices, and unregulated systems.”

— Dr. Liz DeBetta, author of Adult Adoptees and Writing to Heal

Patricia’s writing is at once deeply personal, with intimate scenes of her childhood filled with colorful characters rooted in the south, and expansive, tracing the history of black market adoption in the United States. Throughout, Meyer offers penetrating insights into the singular perspective of an adopted person. Arriving at key answers but no easy resolution, the story powerfully communicates the inhumanity of an industry that treats children as commodities while depriving them of the right to knowledge about their origins. More broadly, it reflects on the cost of adoption itself, a system that profits from separating families, leaving lifelong trauma for all involved and only fragments of identity with which an adopted person may build."

— Amy Seek, author of GOD AND JETFIRE 

“In WONDERLAND: A Black Market Baby's Rise from Adoption's Rabbit Hole, Patricia Knight Meyer, who grew up a relinquished child in the Baby Scoop Era, tenaciously interrogates the history she’s been told in a search for answers about the brutal separation from her first mother and her complex relationship with the troubled parents who raised her. With unswerving courage, compassion, and a commitment to discovering the truth, Knight weaves together and evokes the lived experience of adoptees, first parents, and adoptive parents. In scrutinizing the forces that shaped her life she gives voice to both the enduring wounds of adoption, the choices we make, and the transformative power of reclaiming our stories.”

—Ronit Plank, author of When She Comes Back and host, Let’s Talk Memoir podcast

WONDERLAND forces readers to confront a reality that adoption narratives often avoid: that systems built on secrecy make ordinary people complicit in harm—and leave children to carry the consequences....Clear-eyed and rigorously honest, this memoir belongs in any serious conversation about the legacy of the Baby Scoop Era.”

—Julie Ryan McGue, author of Twice a Daughter, Twice the Family, and Belonging Matters

“Patricia Meyer’s story is a powerful testament to what happens when identity is built on secrecy, and what becomes possible when truth is finally uncovered. Her journey from being sold as a newborn to reclaiming her legal and personal identity decades later reveals the profound impact of trauma, fear, and the lifelong search for belonging. This courageous memoir offers hope to adoptees, parents, and anyone who believes that healing begins when we dare to face the truth.”

—Bryan Post, internationally recognized clinician and speaker, renowned adoption expert, best-selling author of From Fear to Love, and founder of Bondify.ai

Awards & Recognition for WONDERLAND

INDIEREADER Discovery Awards Winner (True Crime) 2026

Eric Hoffer Book Award Finalist (Memoir) 2026

Next Generation Indie Award Finalist (Memoir) 2026

INDIES TODAY 2026 Award Winner - Finalist (Memoir) 2026

Magpie Zine's inaugural Clark Closser Memorial Literature Contest 2026 - Excerpt “Infant Of” Runner-up

Blair Publishers Bakwin Award (Manuscript) Shortlist 2024

C&R Press Prose (Manuscript) Award Shortlist 2025

About PATRICIA KNIGHT MEYER

Patricia Knight Meyer is a journalist, adoption reform advocate, and survivor of the Baby Scoop Era black market. Born in 1970 and trafficked through an attorney-brokered deal, she obtained her first legal birth certificate at age 47. A University of Texas journalism graduate, she founded the adoption blog My Adopted Life and YAYDNA Genetic Greeting Cards. She serves on the board of the National Association of Adoptees and Parents (NAAP) and Concerned United Birth Parents, keynotes at national adoption conferences, and leads memoir writing workshops.